Life, the universe and everything... and sometimes nothing at all... which is still all of those things.
Dear Daylight Savings,
Fuck you and your denying me an hour of sleep. It’s bad enough I’m taking 20 kids skiing all day (leaving at 5am thanks) but now you’re making it so the one our of sleep I was banking on to not strangle people is gone. Super.
Southern Baptist funerals fascinate me. Growing up [grudgingly] Catholic and also attending Methodist and Northern Baptist funerals you get used to a somber occasion… Southern Baptist ceremonies are so joyful, and vocal, and boisterous - it’s amazing and a bit startling.
I’m not a believer, but I’m respectful of other people’s beliefs and I was raised to always be supportive. I’ve never believed in the mythology behind things, but I do enjoy [very] occasionally poking my head in to sample various religions. I tend to do this predominantly at funerals, that’s just the way it works out. I’m not a funeral fanboy or anything (though I do find death and the way people handle death incredibly fascinating), I just tend to attend those more than your standard mass.
Can I just say that the music today was phenomenal To have even a fraction of that talent would be..just..wow. I didn’t get a case of the feels, but I totally understand why people did/do.
I’ve decided that comfort food is your way of getting back at your body for being sick in the first place.
There’s nothing like finding humor in the stupidity of others and then finally finding at least one other person at the office to share it with..
My tablet’s touch screen is too touch-sensitive..
I’ve had a computer most of my life. Not like good computers, but computers in general. My first computer was an old Rainbow Digital; no mouse, predated windows… When I was 6 I rocked DOS so hard.
We didn’t even have your easily accessible dial-up type connection until I was 13, on an old re-purposed Windows 95 machine. The world opened up and everything was amazing (I wasted hours of my life watching that dancing baby).
None of this was quick technology by our current standards… And yeah I bemoaned waiting then. But now, wow, I am so spoiled by technology.. I just spent 30 minutes battling the AAA website to renew my membership and now I’m filled with rage. It’s stupid. I used to wait at least that long to get a video to work on ebaumsworld and that was like 10 years ago, no complaints.
Technology is ruining my already short patience.
Strangers at the mountain I host my youth ski program at treat me with more authority than the parents/kids in my actual program do…
This is a problem.
I have long accepted that I do not understand romance, relationships, etc. I’ve always just gone on the assumption that it’s just a part of my rather antisocial and socially awkward nature (and presumed high spectrum autism, which while never “officially” diagnosed has been unpromptedly “confirmed” by a few different developmental psychologists that specialize in that area - seriously, there’s nothing like being told out of the blue by someone that runs an adult autistic community for a living that she thinks you’re coping well in society living on your own within 10 minutes of meeting you). While that is all probably a contributing factor it didn’t really explain my aversion..
I’ve been in several relationships, many because it was “the thing to do.” It was easier to just date someone than bounce from hook-up to hook-up, I like sex and getting physical - it’s everything else that doesn’t make a whole lot of sense to me. I’ve talked people out of trying to take things to the next level with me, of giving me loving gestures.. so many things make me incredibly uncomfortable.
I decided, after my last “real” relationship ended, that my ideal relationship was just 2 friends that mostly exclusively hooked up from time to time. That’s really what every relationship I’ve ever been in has boiled down to: just 2 people hanging out that will probably fuck later. I was with someone for 6 years, I had no intention of ever marrying him and when we broke up I wasn’t devastated, I was just bummed I’d lost my best friend.
Romantic attraction has never been a factor for me; I’ve never felt butterflies around a person, I’ve never seen someone and said “I’d like to date that,” I’ve never said “I love you” and meant more than “I really like that you’re in my life, please stay a part of it.” I always just lumped it in with the fact I don’t understand people in general, it made sense that beyond physical intimacy I was in the weeds.
So, I kinda feel like I understand myself a lot better than I did when I woke up this morning. Which, is saying something because I’ve always felt I knew exactly who I was. It changes everything, and yet it changes nothing. I was already living my life in a way that ascribed to this, now there’s just a name for it and a reason behind it and the truth that I’m not alone.
I’ve probably done a poor job of explaining things, and that’s okay because it makes sense to me and that’s really what’s important when it all boils down.
PS: Some sites that actually explain what being aromantic is (seriously, it put my life in technicolor):